Volume 1
Ladies and Gents, I bring you Separated at Birth. Can’t shake that feeling that you’ve seen that star player before? You’re right, you have.
I’ll show you where:
Curt Schilling – Jack Bauer
Turn’s out 24 isn’t just how many wins Mr. Bloody Sock aspires to have every season, but I hear its a mega hit TV show as well. Wait…was his bloody sock a factor of his gritty performance in the ‘04 World Series, or was Curt Bauer simply saving the world in between innings and earned a strawberry in the process?!
Steve Nash – James Blunt
After winning his 2nd consecutive MVP award last year, Steve Blunt was inspired to write the hit song “You’re beautiful!…”
Anderson Varejao – Sideshow Bob
In between trying to murder Bart Simpson, Sideshow Varejao is busy playing for the Cleveland Cavaliers.
Carlos Delgado – Pedro Cerrano
Ever wondered what Carlos Delgado would look like if he batted right handed and played for the Indians? It’s not as far fetched as you may think, here’s Carlos in Major League. Thankfully, Jobu was apparently able to help him with those breaking pitches.
My Uncle Rey – Dennis Green
I never saw my Uncle Rey on Sunday’s…until I got the NFL Sunday Ticket. He WAS who I THOUGHT he was! And I let him off the hook!
Sergio Mitre – Captain Jack Sparrow
Throw a puffy shirt on him and show him to the Black Pearl. Avast, ye matey!
John Kruk – Jabba the Hut
Bring me Han Solo!….and a sandwich…next, on Baseball Tonight!
John Gruden – Chucky
This one was beat to death during the Bucs SuperBowl run a couple of years ago, but I couldn’t resist. Next on TBS, Child’s Play XLI: The Draft…right after Everybody loves Raymond!
Andre Kirilenko – Ivan Drago
When asked about Tim Duncan recently during a post game interview, AK-47 chillingly responded “I must break him…If he dies, he dies.” Unfortunately after Game 1 of the 2007 West Finals, he declared “He’s not human…he’s a machine!” Indeed.
And finally,
Sam Cassell – Gollum
The precioussss…it haunts us….until we play for the early ’90’s Rocketsssss….
